She
"Ze" has entered my vocabulary. Ze will not eliminate "he",
"she", and "it"; just adds to it. It might even delight my Tejas-Mejicano campesinos
who will mistake my use of zee language.
Ze does not matter.
So I wrote in a previous column. "She", however, does matter.
It is no longer as repeated as often,
but the old Chinese saying, repeated by Mao Zedong and Deng Xiao Peng, was nu
ren neng ding ban bian tian, “women hold half of the sky.” China today has gone back to being
unapologetically patriarchal. The
systemic reasons are deep, not the least of which is the universal pattern of
naming a child after the father’s ancestral beginnings rather than combining
the mother and father’s gifts.
In my former University classes, I printed my whole name on
the board, Jaime Ravelo Vergara, to indicate how my father and mother’s last
names are my surnames. When I was in
Spain once, I was called Señor Ravelo.
My name over there was formally written as Jaime Vergara y Ravelo.
The name in Spain was actually the way Filipino names were given
during the Spanish period, still true in many Hispanic countries. The European practice included both parent’s surname
when naming a child. It varied on
whether the father or the mother’s came first or second. In some English influenced countries, the
middle name is the mother’s maiden surname.
I some places in the United States, the mother’s surname is
dropped. In China, the wife actually had
no personality in the husband’s household until she was with a child. The only time a mother’s name shows up is when
a combined child’s given name includes that of the mother, more for sentimental
reason than proprietary one.
My children have their mother’s surname as their middle
name. However, in some places where the
mother is the primary care giver, a child’s surname often takes after the
mother, like those of single mothers, or divorced mothers who have sole custody
of the children and reverts back to the maiden name as well as renames everyone
with her surname.
Some boutique practices have entered Americana like families
where the boys take on the father’s surname, and the girls, the mother’s, or
vice-versa. In some, myriad of
combinations apply. The hyphenated
family name, ie., Ravelo-Vergara is common among wives and children.
The family’s surname after a marriage is also changing. In previous times, the universal practice was
for the man’s surname to be adopted, and only after a divorce does the woman
have the option to revert back to her maiden name. There are actually eight States in the Union
that allows man to change into their wives names in marriage without
petitioning the court for the normal process of name change. I once adapted to my Chinese wife’s surname
since the Chinese female always retained her maiden name after marriage. My gesture was ignored and stayed
appreciated!
If patriarchy is deeply embedded in many cultures to the detriment
of female roles, conservative forces in Islamic countries insists that Sharia
provisions on women’s behavior need to be followed. The kind of literal fundamentalism that dogged
the Christian church of my youth is hard to dispel when imposed on members as
inerrant scriptural law. Judaism and
Christianity have variations of the same theme.
The Taliban want women to be subservient. Gang rape in India has exposed a common
travesty. But SHE is fighting back.
“A rose by any other name” served Shakespeare’s audiences
well, and was cute with Romeo and Juliet, but no longer. A rose by any other name is a fluke. She wants her name in golden
letters in the annals of history, just as much as he does, and has as much
equal right to it as anyone. No
affirmative action required, just the right to be SHE!
There were seven revolutions I’ve joined in my life: 1)
youth and emotive exuberance, 2) minorities and their civil rights, 3) Third
World’s independence from imperial and colonial designs, 4) university vs. multiversity
without a cognitive overview, 5) global business against protectionism and
entrenched patrimony, 6) the rise of local men and women, and 7) women’s
rightful place in humanity’s leveled field.
The ethos of youth now pervades fashion and there is nothing
more disconcerting than to watch a grandma on jeans try to look like a teenager.
Minorities no longer wait under the
corporate table to catch droppings. They
insist on sitting around the table of life’s feasts with the rest of the
crowd. Third World’s fight against
imperial and colonial designs is harder to shake. Constitutional monarchies, an anachronism,
still keep the aristocrats in England and the elite in Thailand in power. Universities try to keep things together,
though pyramidal hierarchy still define tenure rather than flatbed swirling
networks of lively intelligences.
Globalization is a monster though it shook the roots of privileged
economic monopolies. The rise of local
people is wreaking havoc around the word.
My daughters have gone way beyond “God is a girl!”
The We shall overcome chorus
is still playing at my house.
Jaime Vergara
yesterday, appreciate; tomorrow, anticipate; today. participate. In all, celebrate!