I thought I had shed all my tears,
a lifetime of tears,
drops rivuletting canyons in once smoothe skin,
cascading into deltas and emptying into a sea of sorrow,
now parched and dried like
my once choking and burning throat.
I thought I had shed all my tears,
a lifetime of tears,
sobs of shock and pain muffled in pillows,
deep shaking heaves trying to catch breath,
threatening to suffocate.
I thought I had shed all my tears,
a lifetime of tears,
of hurt and hurting, of remorse for the done and undone,
the betrayal of and by those close,
the final separation from loved ones, land,
and what is most cherished,
of sleepless nights and
prayers like drops of blood for the sick and dying,
of births that never were.
of fading health and dreams.
I thought I had shed all my tears,
a lifetime of tears,
screams and cries of anger, fear, and anguish over
the corruption, consumption, and killing fields of
Earth and all that is in it,
billions of years extinguishing
in the embers and ashes of truth and justice,
communities and trust shattered,
innocent suffering,
sacredness violated, sorrow unbounded,
lamenting echoing lamenting, looping and looping and looping,
grief unbearable, unconsolable, overwhelming, numbing,
dried, vacant eyes staring stoically into the void,
filled with harpies advertising, urging, encouraging
to eat, drink, and be merry. But
how can I sing while mourning in
this strange, foreign land?
I thought I had shed all my tears,
a lifetime of tears, no more left to be wiped away.
I woke up in the middle of the night,
anxiously awaiting dawn, but
the heavens were weeping, lightning
and street lamps the only light,
cloud-bursting, four winds swirling,
thundering, torrents and storms of tears,
piercing the soil and bouncing off asphalt,
quenching the drought-thirsty trees losing
autumn muted colored leaves,
trying to cleanse, to refresh, to renew, to regenerate
the parched planet and also
piercing my soul, drilling into
unbeknown, untapped fossilized tears that melted, trickled,
moistened eyelids, then gushed,
flowing, cleansing and renewing.
No rainbow but deep gratitude and stillness and
a new Covenant with a new day and
All that is in it.
Then I calmly reached for a box of Kleenex.
ejhs
10/30/2023