Hello Cynthia,

Thank you for your word of Bob's passing and of his journeying on.  What a good man!

I remember the two of you in Jaipur in 1984 and your decision shockingly thereafter to embody that 'watershed'' moment by leaving the OE.

I recall today when Bob and I were among a few American students in Germany during 1959 and 1960.

Vividly grounded in my being is going with him out on the streets in Fifth City during the 1968 riots in response to the killing of MLK.

You, too, are a joyful memory as a buoyant smiling college student in the winter snow on the newly cleared sidewalks in Drew's forest campus.

The two of you were a nonchalant image of a family as priors with a deep sense of practical purpose, gentle humor and straightforwardness.

Many will be grateful to both of you for your family commitment to each other and for your caring for friends.  A special thanks to those who are there to support you, your sister, Cecily, and other immediate family.

May Bob's ashes in the Gulf of Mexico replenish its health, may his brain edify researchers, and may you be more and more well, Cynthia! 

Reminiscences in a world of impermanence is becoming now one of our common rituals of collegial presence and appreciation.

With gratitude for your journey,  Charles


Al Lingo
clingojr@aol.com


-----Original Message-----
From: Cynthia Vance via Dialogue <dialogue@lists.wedgeblade.net>
To: dialogue <dialogue@lists.wedgeblade.net>
Cc: Cynthia Vance <facilitationfla@aol.com>
Sent: Wed, Aug 15, 2018 5:30 am
Subject: [Dialogue] from Cynthia Vance

Dear Friends and Colleagues,
 
My dear Bob passed away today, Monday, August 13.
 
On July 11 I enrolled him in Hospice at Home, due to his increasing symptoms from (possibly) Lewy Body dementia and I cared for him since then.  Last Sunday morning he awoke with extreme difficulties. The Hospice nurse came and felt he probably had a 'neurological event' the Saturday evening before, perhaps while sleeping.  She took him to the Venice Hospice House at 6pm that night. 
 
I visited him 90 minutes later. He was very calm but not very responsive. I shared my reflections as I showed him 4 photos -- his parents, his brothers Neil and Denny, our doxies Star and Matilda and finally Bob and me. I also read two poems I had written (about the dogs!) and a love letter highlighting and thanking him for the special times we shared as a team in our community service/civil rights efforts, followed by our strategic planning consulting, and finally in our various nature adventures.  We had had these discussions before and had agreed that history had given us a fine ride! – and that hopefully we made the world a little better.  He died peacefully 5 hours later, 1:30 am, early Monday morning. 
 
I’m grateful for the wonderful life and marriage we had.  I could ask for no more. Our home was one of peace, love, respect, creative planning and always in anticipation of our next birding or butterflying adventure.  He was always kind to others and was a terrific partner in our life work together!  
 
Many of you, our colleagues over the years, wrote letters to him or telephoned him in the past 10 days.  He was so pleased to hear from you and I’m grateful that you reached out to us.  You shared your appreciation of his life and brought us great joy.
 
My sister, Cecily, has been with me for 2 days and as an R.N. has given me guidance during this journey. Other friends locally have compassionately reached out to me.
 
Bob has donated his brain to the University of Miami Brain Endowment Bank to both confirm (or not) the diagnosis and to contribute to their research.  We will be spreading his ashes in our Butterfly Garden and the Gulf of Mexico where he proudly completed 990 SCUBA dives to collect hundreds of vertebrate fossils. 
 
Grace and Peace,
 
Cynthia 
941-483-9165
 
 
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