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</o:shapelayout></xml><![endif]--></head><body lang=EN-US link="#0563C1" vlink="#954F72"><div class=WordSection1><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>My friend and colleague, Barbara Hawkins, responded to the last part of my reflection of August 31 with the following. I thought it might be of interest to you, and perhaps a way of continuing conversation over a serious matter. Her response was to this paragraph: <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto;text-indent:.5in'><i><span style='font-size:11.0pt;color:#5B9BD5'>“Then, along with remembering the death of 3 (firefighters), the same paper this morning reports the death of a child, killed in her own bedroom while doing homework, from a stray bullet by a gun fired outside. A recent statistic states that, in the USA, there have been more deaths by guns than in ALL of the wars and other conflicts in which our nation has participated! Men (and women) are fighting natural disasters like fires today, but how do we fight this particular disaster?”<o:p></o:p></span></i></p><p class=MsoNormal>Del, I've been thinking and thinking about your compelling observations, thoughts and bottom-line question: 'how do we fight this particular disaster?' re killings via guns.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>My thoughts / my opinions on this issue may not be popular. Nevertheless, I'd like to share them with you. <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>It seems to me that if someone chooses to kill - for <u>any</u> 'reason' - they <u>are</u> going to kill. No matter what age, race or gender, sooner or later they're going to act on their choice unless they experience an epiphany leading them to make a different choice i.e. not kill.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>A gun is often the quickest tool (yes, it is a tool.) and, particularly for the young people / gang types (boy, am I being political incorrect!) it's a favored tool. Why? Because it doesn't require much effort... just enough to pick it up and pull the trigger... nor does it require getting close. It's loud, it's Hollywood, it creates an immediate effect even beyond the one it was aimed at, it's <u>showy</u> and it often gets the desired result... if the aim was right. At least it gets attention and approval and that's to be an important need for everyone. <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>If there was no gun and one couldn't be obtained, then, assuming the choice stays the same, there will be another way to kill: a knife, a screwdriver, a tire iron, a concrete block, a shoelace and so many other ways. If someone chooses to kill, they find a way.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>I'm definitely a supporter of background checks for prospective gun owners.. even though I recognize that criminals are going to get a gun somewhere if that's what they really want.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>I also support the idea that gun owners need to know how to store and maintain their gun. That translates to some kind of program where 1) different storage options are presented and the new gun owner <u>must</u> choose (buy) one of them or show proof that they already have the appropriate storage feature. Weapons need to be stored where children, of any age, cannot get them. Or at least, they can't get them easily. And 2) the new gun owner must go through some type of training on how to maintain their gun <u>or</u> show proof they've gone through the same or similar training previously. Without completion of both above, the purchase transaction aborts.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>I feel it's important to instill respect in the fact of gun ownership. A gun is a weapon. It's designed to kill something. It needs to be controlled whether it's in hand or "at rest". The respect is not just for the gun but also for the owner. It's a responsibility to own and control the use of such a weapon.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Back to your question: 'how do we fight this particular disaster?' It is my opinion that this is a <i>disorder of the heart</i>... the heart of society and the hearts of individuals. I'm speaking in <u>sweeping</u> generalization, of course, but this is what I'm observing.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Increasingly we in the West experience life within an isolationist perspective. Grow up, do well in school, compete in school, get a job, compete in the workplace, go out on your own, be a success, compete to be a bigger success, do what you must in order to be a success, etc. Always busy busy busy!<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Success being defined as having lots of money, lots of stuff, being 'at the top', seeming complete power over your own life and maybe over others, etc. <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Where did cooperation go? Compassion?<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Today there's little importance attached to being part of a family, part of a community, part of the natural world. We've lost sight of our connection to each other and to our world. Our focus has become competition and success. Again, where did cooperation go? And where did our awareness of being a part of all life go?<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>If you have this perspective, you're constantly on guard for your life... either in the short term (as in who may stab you in the back or shoot you, etc.) or in the longer term (as in who may outperform you, get your job, undermine you, etc.)<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>This is <u>not</u> the way I was raised. My hometown was what we would probably today call rural... right on the edge of farmland, small. At home, at church, in elementary school, I heard about the desirability of cooperation. High school? More about competition.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>I was blessed to attend a small mid-west "woman's college" where academic excellence was expected. Not because we were pushed to compete but because all of us were expected to be the best. Competition existed but was not put over cooperation. I now realize I experienced a combination of Utopia and an oasis!<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Over my lifetime I've observed the growing emphasis on competition and with it, more and more stress, unhappiness, sense of being disenfranchised, feeling lost and alone. At the same time, there's a loss of family connection for many people. Often we're too busy to spend time together, even a couple of times a year.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Bottom line: I believe we need to heal our hearts. Until we do, there will still be violence, killing. In fact, I believe that until we do, the killing will increase.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><i><span style='color:red'>(I have placed her information below in case you wish to continue this discussion with her. Send me a copy, if so, because it continues to interest me.)<o:p></o:p></span></i></p><p class=MsoNormal align=right style='text-align:right'><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal align=center style='text-align:center'>Barbara Hawkins<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal align=center style='text-align:center'>Life By Design Hypnotherapy<br>Certified Life Skills Coach<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal align=center style='text-align:center'><a href="tel:253-225-9731" target="_blank">253-225-9731</a>, <a href="mailto:hypnotherapy.lbd@gmail.com">hypnotherapy.lbd@gmail.com</a><o:p></o:p></p></div></body></html>