[Oe List ...] Conversation with Janice

[LAURELCG at aol.com]

Beloved Community,
 
All day yesterday, I allowed myself to be in denial of Janice's departure.  
I never met her in person, but we had been in dialogue since she let  us 
all know of her lymphoma diagnosis on May 11. I went through my e-mail files  
this morning, looking again at the wonder of her last few weeks.
 
Her birthday greeting to Marge, on June 1, is especially poignant,  knowing 
as we now do, the wonderful gift that went with it:
 

"Dear Marge, 


When I think of you I think of sparkle,  and fun, and always welcoming 
hospitality. Oh yes - and the most dedicated,  determined work ethic when you 
decide something is necessary! Better not get in  your way - people, 
discouragements, or "that's impossibles"! 

You have cared for your family with such  love and insight - then you have 
reached out to extend that care to your  colleagues and people in the 
communities you have served. Just a few of the many  reasons you inspire us. 


Happy, happy 85th birthday. Gee, we're  glad we have known you! Let's see - 
at least several hundred people from all  around the world would love to be 
at your celebration. Have a wonderful time.  And Paula, thanks for honoring 
this terrific woman.


With much affection, 
Janice Ulangca" 
 
 I sent her a copy of my book, and cried this morning as I read her  
response, written hurriedly amid her still-active life of service, on June  6.
 
"Jann,

This is a packed day - routine followup med appt 1:45 - need  to organize 
my list of questions to ask before that. Tonite will do 5-minute  intro of 
honoree for community award - 200 people there - so focus energy there.  BUT 
have to say a quick word that your book is incredibly helpful. Am reading a  
chapter or 2 a day. We will have a lot to talk about.

Your poetry is magnificent!"
 
On July 17, she wrote the following to the listserve:

"Where I am these days: In the midst of chemo  treatments for lymphoma 
cancer, energy is only available in small amounts. So  it's measured out 
carefully, for important things.

Today I turned 78 - and so after lunch with  friends and a long nap, made a 
careful decision to sample Jack Gilles'  account. "Maybe just this part ... 
And this part ... Hey - can't I invest an  hour today?! Wouldn't it be 
great to do this on my birthday (instead of dishes  that wait)?" So I did, and 
it was great. I was captivated and my own memories,  current life, and even 
new decisions made clearer, out of a richer  context.

So thank you, Jack. And thank you, Michael May,  for all you are doing to 
illuminate our inner stories about our lives. It is  important that encounter 
with these lives be made available.

Janice  Ulangca"



And that same day she wrote this to me:
 

 
"Dear Jann,

One of these weeks I will call - and set up a time when we can talk. Much  
to share, I think. I just run out of energy so fast - and every little thing 
 takes some. Which normally I haven't given a thought to. Just know that I 
have  MUCH appreciated your book, and the you revealed therein. Healing 
things -  appts., meds, rests - practical things - bills paid, groceries bought, 
easy  cooking, minimal cleaning done. Staying in contact with local 
friends/colleagues  who want it, give me rides, etc. Then one project I'm keeping 
rolling - see  attached. But am still looking forward much to talking with 
you.

Janice"
 
I'm sorry I didn't save the attachment. It was a church-related project.  
Perhaps someone else can tell us about it.
 
We both listened to the Shift Network broadcast, "The New Scientific  
Revolution." Here's our conversation about it:
 
 
Sent: Saturday, July 20, 2013 4:12 PM
Subject: Scientific Revolution  session


Janice,

Did you enjoy this session? I thought it was quite powerful and I may just  
sign up for the course it was out to sell.

I had already signed up for the session when you put it on the  listserve, 
but was gratified that you did. When Ken Wilbur was speaking of Carol  
Gilligan's level of Universal Care, the image of EI/ICA's poster of the Iron Man  
with "All the Earth Belongs to All the People" came to mind. It's hard to  
believe now that we didn't include the biosphere, but I suppose that's the 
way  the unfolding of evolution works.

I hope you're feeling well. I'm looking forward to our conversation.

Blessings,
Jann McGuire
 
In response, she sent her notes on the session, and I made comments on her  
response in red:
 
In a message dated 7/20/2013 4:50:41 P.M. Pacific Daylight Time,  
aulangca at stny.rr.com writes:

"After some food and rest:

Hi Jann,

Yes I did enjoy this. I process best when I take notes, so I  did get 4 
pages. The 7 sessions of Laszlo's course sound good - mind-expanding  for sure. 
Haven't decided yet whether to sign up. Feel I must be careful -  many 
things want/need to do, learn about. Am still scheduled to have treatment  
related injections through 1st week of Sept. But this is foundational, so  maybe 
...

Images that stick with me: 

Ervin Laszlo: The universe as a cosmic internet! Connecting  everything. 
(Before the internet, don't think we could have imagined any  force/entity 
connecting everything. But now we take that possibility for  granted - global 
connection instantly among people. Can we expand that to  include all? Every 
part of nature, beings of every size . ..  )"



I wonder how he spells it. I believe Ken Wilber spells  it Kosmos when he's 
speaking of more-than-physical cosmos. 


"Duane Elgin: working with Joseph Campbell who saw "a life  force, moving 
through everything" - and Duane mentions David Bohm's phrase "a  unified 
whole in flowing movement." Domination doesn't work - dancing with the  force 
does. (Wow!) The Universe has a moral fabric built into it - toward  
creativity, caring, connectedness. The Cosmic Internet evokes a Living - not a  dead 
- Universe. We are learning to live in a Living Universe! Will ponder how  
that is different from living in a world with older images of an active God 
in  our lives. That has been too often a way to ask for special privileges - 
even  to help us dominate."

I think I resonated more strongly with Duane Elgin than  anyone else today, 
although they're all great. I love to think of NASA having  paid psychics.


"Riane's focus on relationship systems, from family (how  children learn 
what is possible, what not possible) to politics and  economics." 

Relational Dynamics made me think of the social process  triangles. I want 
to go back and read "The Partnership Way" again. 



"Barbara's mention of "points of light around the globe as  individuals 
wake up - can they be - are they being - all connected at  once?"

The word involution grabbed my attention. I do think  I'm experiencing it.


"Ken Wilbur's 5 kinds of perspectives made my head swim. Any  one of them 
could take an hour to give examples from. He's phenomenally  analytical. Have 
bumped into his levels of spiritual understanding before -  found them to 
be brilliant yet somehow detached. ... I'm with you in finding  his mention 
of Carol Gilligan's examples of the 4th level of care to be  meaningful.

Well, enough for now. Now need to make a couple of phone  calls. Last 
scheduled chemo this Tues. all day. Will go to my meaningful  church tomorrow, 
use Mon. for errands to prepare for doing nothing 5 days  after Tues."

I'll be thinking of you as you go through this last  round. You won't be 
doing nothing. You'll be healing.



"Thanks for starting a good reflection. Enjoyed  it!

Janice"

That was our last conversation. We never did get to have our phone  
conversation about our lymphoma experiences. I don't know the cause of death,  but 
I doubt it was lymphoma, which responds to chemotherapy better than  any 
other cancer. The treatment is quite debilitating to the immune  and other 
systems. I appreciate the good fight that Janice fought. Truly, she  rests in 
peace.
 
In my e-mail search, I also found beautiful poetry below she sent  in 
December: Its prophetic tone gave me chills. How beautiful her  spirit is. What a 
privilege to have her as a friend/teacher/mentor.
 
Love and blessings
 
 
In a message dated 12/14/2012 7:46:14 A.M. Pacific Standard Time,  
aulangca at stny.rr.com writes:


"To my friends and many teachers/mentors  in the ICA community - I continue 
learn so much from you!
Profound gratitude and wishes for a  splendid, radiant season.
Janice Ulangca


 
Advent: A coming into  being  
3rd definition, Merriam Webster Collegiate  Dictionary 
A Conversation with Advent
O  Advent 
I think you are my  favorite 
Of all the seasons in  the church year 
Because you ask that  I wake up, be vigilant, 
And open to some  startling surprise, some wonder 
That never has  existed ‘til today. 
Advent, beyond the rush, the noisy fun,   
the customary  words, 
There is a vast and  tender silence 
And I will meet you  there. 
At first it may seem  boring to be still  
But slowly in the  quietness there will be 
A radiance, a peace,  a profound care. 
Advent, I will dare  to bring you this year’s pain 
The darkness,  failures and the broken plans. 
Perhaps in the  stillness 
With patience and  expectancy 
They may gently be  exchanged  
For healing and for hope . . . 
And it will not be  fake 
To welcome Joy. JU  2012
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