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<font face="Comic Sans MS"><big>Bully conversation --<br>
<br>
This is one place I find our listservs serve us well. I watch
for the next header to pop up with another thoughtful
contribution to the thread.<br>
<br>
I can't get into this one without it triggering old memories and
stories. Those of us who have used and taught our methods over
the years have probably not only seen most of their possible
bungled applications--we've probably made most of them
ourselves. There are so many aspects to leading or facilitating
any of these that we pretty quickly learn none of them can be
reduced to just a set of steps or procedures which, once
learned, assure future success. Trust the method, to be sure;
then mix in all those learnings about yourself, those you work
with and life itself that really make that method work.<br>
<br>
I still have vivid memories of the first time I was assigned to
lead the conversation method in a live RS-1. It was with a
large group in Room A, West Side, latter 60s, and I'd been given
the Freedom Conversation ("Who'd be willing to take George to
the airport?"). Amazingly to me, it wasn't going nearly as well
as I recalled it had in my own RS-1. As I was struggling to
stay afloat, Slicker edged in to help redirect things so that
the group could genuinely wrestle with the issues being raised.
I felt like a flaming failure--then came to treasure it as one
of my great learning moments.<br>
<br>
A story that bears on what we've been talking about is of Joe's
take on the conversation method. It was in a pedagogy guild; he
was leading it, and we were on the movie conversation. I recall
one of the staff asking him something like, "Joe, how do we make
sure in this conversation that people <i>get it</i> about Miss
Miller?" <br>
<br>
Joe's response was abrupt and unequivocal: "That's not your
job! You're not out here to <u>teach</u> anyone anything.
Teaching happens in the seminars, not in the conversations.
Your job, what this conversation method does, is to see that
people seriously confront the life questions that this movie
raises. <i>That </i>they authentically confront them is your
concern;<i> what</i> they decide about them is not."<br>
<br>
He paused, then added: "Now, if six months or six years later,
someone who was in this conversation should be sitting on the
crapper--and all of sudden--jump up and shout, 'MISS MILLER WAS
A SHITASS!'--well, that would be great. But that's not your
job, not the job of the conversation, to make that happen."<br>
<br>
Joe had his ways to make his points stick with you.<br>
<br>
When I teach the Focused Conversation method or ORID these days,
I tell people that it can be--often is--used in teaching; and
that it can be--indeed, often is--used to help a group reach
some level of agreement or consensus; but that its real job is
to help the group to have the serious conversation it needs to
have.<br>
<br>
Gordon</big><br>
</font><br>
<br>
On 5/3/2012 2:55 PM, Wilson Priscilla wrote:
<blockquote
cite="mid:6FC36E19-E37A-477A-AE02-9FC1A75EB1E3@TeamTechPress.com"
type="cite">You can read about a wide variety of leadership roles
and skills in <i>The Facilitative Way. </i>The premise of the
book is that everyone in the "group" is called to be a
leader...assume responsibility for what is happening.
<div><br>
<div>I happen to recommend the book...which is now available
again after being out of print for a year.</div>
<div>Anyone interested can let me know and I'll give you a
Discount code to purchase it for $6.95.</div>
<div><br>
</div>
<div>I'm enjoying all the variety of methods conversations...</div>
<div>Priscilla Wilson</div>
<div><br>
<div>
<div>On May 3, 2012, at 4:43 PM, steve har wrote:</div>
<br class="Apple-interchange-newline">
<blockquote type="cite">
<div>To my taste nurturing roots and growing new shoots is
actually a<br>
timely task in the face of a 50 year vision.<br>
<br>
Nurturing roots and shoots for ways of leading in
complex situations<br>
is a good thing.<br>
<br>
Debating the reliability of ORID with facilitators is
like listening<br>
to a group of carpenters argue about whether hammers put
nails in<br>
boards.<br>
<br>
Studying Brian's new version of Chapter 10 would be
delightful,<br>
especially online with generous hearts and open inquiry<br>
<br>
What new shoots for 50 years?<br>
<br>
Building a house with only a carpenter and a hammer
seems silly.<br>
Plumbers and Roofers would be good.<br>
<br>
Bending history with only a facilitator role and an ORID
conversation<br>
seems daunting as well.<br>
<br>
I'm thinking more roles, conversations and tools are
needed:<br>
Facilitators facilitate knowing<br>
Pedagogues and Story-Makers grant being<br>
Navigators, Coaches, Mentors cause action outcomes<br>
<br>
Mathews's NRM and Jenkins's 9D book don't only belong to
facilitators.<br>
Might be a good point of departure for some new
thinking.<br>
<br>
Did you read Kaze Gadway's post this morning? She's hard
at work in<br>
the Being-Doing mode. She is mentoring those indian kids
on behalf of<br>
the next generation. She's granting new being side by
side with those<br>
kids. There is no facilitation in sight.<br>
<br>
Not everyone needs to think, be, do it al, all the time
either. Seems<br>
like it is a time for more appreciative inquiry and more
innovations<br>
not less.<br>
<br>
--re presuppositions--<br>
<br>
The assertion that ORID is THE way the mind thinks
doesn't pass the<br>
"no-smiling allowed" test in Buddhist circles. It would
be a topic for<br>
generous respectful inquiry, maybe a testable
hypothesis.<br>
<br>
Heidegger asserted that most people don't actually know
much about<br>
hammering, especially carpenters, they are just being
in the world<br>
hammering. Not too much reflection goes on until the
hammer hits the<br>
thumb for most carpenters. Kind of sets those Cartesian
abstractionist<br>
back a step or two.<br>
<br>
Carpenters have skillful means they don't need to do an
ORID they just<br>
have the experience of hammering skillfully. Some people
focus on<br>
knowing, some on doing, some on doing.<br>
<br>
I assert that the world needs more leadership roles, and
facilitators<br>
have great skill set. It isn't the only leadership skill
set.<br>
<br>
Mathews had a fine insight when he separated out the
phenomena of<br>
knowing being and doing. What new leadership roles and
conversations<br>
and skillful means?<br>
<br>
What happens when you take up a practice like
facilitating, teaching,<br>
coaching, mentoring, story-making skill sets? You
practice being<br>
skillful until you get it right and you get it
automatic.<br>
See: <a moz-do-not-send="true"
href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dreyfus_model_of_skill_acquisition">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dreyfus_model_of_skill_acquisition</a><br>
<br>
If you plot leadership roles on Mathews's NRM triangle
as updated by<br>
the Jenkins it might look like this<br>
<a moz-do-not-send="true"
href="https://docs.google.com/document/d/1DlNTut28MXqLnv-_Xd2yPoHONBHlOAJLC8AmwL_O2B8/edit">https://docs.google.com/document/d/1DlNTut28MXqLnv-_Xd2yPoHONBHlOAJLC8AmwL_O2B8/edit</a><br>
<br>
Seems like some new skill sets might evolve too.<br>
<br>
What do you think?<br>
<br>
Steve<br>
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<div style="word-wrap: break-word;
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<div>Priscilla H Wilson</div>
<div><a moz-do-not-send="true"
href="mailto:Pris@TeamTechPress.com">Pris@TeamTechPress.com</a></div>
<div>913-432-2107</div>
<div><a moz-do-not-send="true"
href="http://www.teamtechpress.com">www.teamtechpress.com</a></div>
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